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The Big Cleanup, Day #2: Secondlife of the party

So today started with another small decaf from Dunkin Donuts.  I decided that 5mg of coffee per day is better than none -- a teeny boost to my day with the flavor of coffee that I've associated with getting up in the morning for so many years.

The morning went fine, not much of a headache, but everything I did at work today was something I usually do with coffee in hand.  Hard code problem?  Grab coffee.  Creative writing?  Definitely grab coffee.  My friend and #1 coffee date Adam called saying he was just back in town and we should get together and ... grab coffee.  But then he didn't know I'd started my cleanup.  So I told him, and he put the evil evil idea in my head of having a Decaf Soy Latte.  Wow, a way to cheat and get some milky goodness along with just a teensy bit more caffeine!

So although I didn't have coffee with Adam, by about 2pm, the afternoon fuzzies were setting in, and I was pretty out of it.  I decided to go grab myself some fruit to try to make myself feel better, but the lure of a creamy afternoon treat was stuck in my head.  So I hit Starbucks. Yes, Starbucks. Couldn't think of another local place that would do a soy latte, let alone make it taste good... and it turns out Starbucks decaf is actually as low in caffeine as other decafs, which is kinda amazing, when you consider how high the caffeine level is in their regular coffees...

So I had my recent favorite beverage, the Orange Mocha latte, but decaf and with soy. It tasted so good that I actually went back to double check that it was soy and decaf.  And it was!   So I excitedly called Andrew to tell him I figured out a way to make it through this month, but then he pointed out that soy has estrogen in it, and probably should be off my list for now as well!  Argh!

Later in the day, I had my usual energy bar, and of course then realized that had soy in it as well.  That's when I decided screw it.  Even if soy messes up my experiment a little, I can't be cutting out all the staples of my diet.  It's hard enough for me to force myself to eat 3 full meals a day to gain weight, let alone the 5-6 meals the workout books all suggest.  I figure cutting out the caffeine will help me to feel hungrier sooner, but so far all I am doing is drinking LOTS of water.

In fact, at the Linden Lab recruiting party, I went through FOUR bottles of the stuff in two hours.  It was pretty warm in there, but still!   Good thing I wasn't drinking.  Everyone else was, though.  I mean, it's a recruiting party, so you're supposed to schmooze.  Problem for me: I really am a better schmoozer after a drink; without one, I get a bit too caught up in my own head, worrying about who I am talking to, what they are thinking, etc.

So needless to say, being at a party where the whole POINT is that you are being evaluated based on how well you hold up a conversation (after your skills have been judged worthy enough to make it to the VIP lounge... or after you have a friend get you in...) wasn't working so well for me.  The first few Lindens I talked with all ended the conversation with "I have to go talk to some people now..." which I'm sure was true, given they all had certain recruiting goals, but MAN, it sounded harsh a couple times.

Fortunately, my friend Kent (who was my "in" to the event) kept introducing me to people, so eventually a Linden did take note of me, and we had a nice chat.  I'm not sure they had any idea what to do with my skill set, but I think that's as much my fault as anything: I didn't really come with a specific vision for a job in SecondLife that fit the mold of what they expected.  I had an idea, but it was kind of complicated to explain.  And, since it seemed like most of these recruiting conversations were targeted to last 5 minutes or less, there wasn't a lot of time!

The other Linden encounter of note was with a very cute Linden (several were cute, but in case I get a job there, they shall remain unnamed!) who seemed interested in talking with me about job ideas at first.  But then this complete jackhole muscled in on my conversation, converting everything I was saying into "we" statements, even though I didn't even know his name.  The guy wasn't even interested in the same sort of jobs I'd be interested in, so it wasn't like this was a competitive interviewing situation!  But still, it got to the point where he was just making me look bad, but there wasn't a graceful way out of the situation without breaking off the conversation with a potential recruiter.  An example:

Linden: So what brings you here?
Me: I've been playing SecondLife for about 3 years now, and...
Jackhole: Oh YEAH, we were just talking about how great SecondLife is and how the textures of this place would be so great for the game, but then we noticed the NUDES on the walls, and we wouldn't want you to think we were PERVS or somethin'!

[There were tasteful artsy nudes on the walls, dimly lit so you really only saw shapes and forms.  Not my style, but not something I would have commented on.  And now I was a part of this.  Ech.]

Fast forward 5 minutes...

Linden (awkwardly): I have to go talk to some other people now...

Thanks, jackhole.

After that, I was ready to leave the party.  And Andrew, who still can surprise me with his sweetness sometimes, actually left hanging out with a friend to meet me at home because he knew I'd need a big hug (I'd been texting him updates throughout the party).  But then, just as I was looking for the restroom, my friend Alice appeared in front of me.  Big hugs and smiles ensued.  She had her whole fun posse with her, and then she pointed out I was surrounded by cute guys, and suddenly everything seemed a little better.

And of course, THAT was when a Linden finally wanted to talk to me... while I was doing the peepee dance.

So we chatted a bit, and then I left, feeling a bit more satisfied, and actually wishing I could stay longer to hang out with Alice.  She is totally my good luck charm now!

Endnote: I was going to talk more specifically about what's going on biologically with me, since folks keep asking, but then I found out that because I mentioned Boston College in yesterday's message, I'm now linked on some university updates site!  Oops, this will probably put me up there again!  Maybe tomorrow I'll be careful not to mention any colleges or companies and tell y'allmore!

The Big Cleanup, Day #1

Writing this on Day #2, as last night I went to sleep early to try to avoid the worsening caffeine headache...

So yesterday I started "The Big Cleanup" -- no caffeine, no milk, and no alcohol for a month.  The original plan had been to start on June 1 and go for 6 weeks, but then I had a health annoyance on Memorial Day that caused me to end my weekend on a much lower note than it started.  On Tuesday, when I headed in to work, I thought I might still wait until Friday to start, especially since I had a two-hour meeting first thing in the morning -- and nothing goes better with a long meeting than coffee!  But, both Dunkin Donuts that are on my route to work had long lines, so I ended up boarding the subway without any coffee.

By the time we got out to Boston College, I was actually feeling OK, but one of my fellow meeting-goers needed his coffee.  So, I grabbed a decaf.  While "The Big Cleanup" is partly because of stomach problems I've been having (and therefore decaf wouldn't be a big help), I'm also trying to clear out my system for other reasons, which I'll go into in a later posting.

Anyway, decaf coffee contains about 5mg of caffeine (compared to 100mg in regular coffee), and I had the decaf black.  Now, usually I take my coffee with plenty of milk (which in of itself was a big cut-down from the Dunks "regular", which consists of lots o cream!) and two sugars (which is significantly less than how much Dunks usually puts in!), so this was setting myself up for a far less fun experience than usual. But, I guess my body decided it was better than nothing, as I found myself drinking the whole cup during the meeting!

However, by about 2 in the afternoon, I was stumbling around.  It was seriously like being drunk.  I found myself not speaking clearly at various points, definitely not thinking so quickly, and getting very little done on the job.  Gabe (who I consider my boss at my company, in that he keeps everyone, including me, on track) even suggested I have some tea to wake up.  But I really wanted to stick to the no caffeine part of this regimen.

Late in the afternoon, I had a meeting with a student and I had to fight the reflex to go get coffee.  Again, coffee and meetings seem to go together like chocolate ice cream and nipples -- what?  Like you haven't thought of it.

Anyway, I slogged my way through the meeting.  The student was offering me some constructive criticism on my teaching, and I appreciated it, and if anything, I may have been more attentive a listener than usual.  I try not to be that guy who's always thinking of the next thing he's going to say while the other person is talking, but my brain tends to move at a pace where that just happens... even though I really am listening. But in this case, all I could do was listen, then pause for a long while to formulate my response.  So maybe it looked like I was listening more... I can only hope I didn't just look completely slow.

That may sound like an odd concern, but earlier I ran into a friend on the street and he kept looking at me funny, as if he thought I was on drugs - which is of course, funny, since if anything right now without the caffeine, I'm the opposite.

After the meeting, I went home and napped for a bit to try to rid myself of the headache, and did a bit more online research to reassure myself that this whole experiment is medically worthwhile.  Everything I found suggested that it is, so, I decided to suck it up and head to the gym.

Although getting through even a short 30-minute workout with my headache was a challenge, I managed, and that gave me enough extra energy to socialize with a few friends in the locker room without sounding like a total git.  I then headed to the store, bought dinner, and headed home, where I found the boyfriend suffering from a tummyache.  So between the two of us, we were quite the miserable pair!

After dinner, we watched a bit of TV, but at 11pm we both were looking at the clock, like "Why are we staying up?"  So we hopped in bed.  Andrew played videogames for an hour, though, so I didn't get a lot of sleep with him clacking away next to me.  However, I don't blame him, since it was really my headache magnifying every sound in the house.

Got up twice during the night, and slept in until about 8:20 this morning.